April 10, 2013

Oh the heart ache….
Oh my heart..
My poor, poor heart.
To see someone you can’t touch
To love someone you can’t reach…
They seem so close
When in reality they are not.
The distance seems of that of the sun
And you are all alone in this large universe..
Lonely star… She will be together with the sun again.
For now all she can do us cry upon the Earth…
My poor heart…
Love is such a curse
One that I am willing to pay
But when will the pain stop.
There is no cure for this curse
You are my only cure
And I can’t….
I can’t get.. to.. you
Oh this curse…
It is worth it just to have you by my side for eternity.. But when will I be in your arms once more..



February 7, 2012

What can you do?

You live in two lives.

Your own

and in someone else’s

Always following some one else’s shoes.

But you hate it, you want to live your own life. You think it is about time. Even though it seems impossible. Outlandish.

But this little girl had to grow up

This little girl had to grow up before they started throwing stones . and now that she is up, she runs, but after running; you want to fly.

She wants to stop running- she wants to fly.

But she can’t fly….

A bird speaks to her,

tells her to follow him

The bird begs her to follow, she watches him fly and she longs to join him.

How long will it be,

I hate to say this…

But do you know how everyone is dying for a movie relationship??

Well once you have one, you would love to run back to your imperfect relationship. There is nothing wrong with one of those. At least you get to see them and even though you fight and he sleeps on the couch for the night. The next day you make him dinner to make up for it.

Even if he doesn’t live with you…

You ignore the messages, you cry alone in bed, you avoids him at school. But then he says, “I’m sorry.” And everything is fine.

It’s a fucked up life you have

But it’s perfect in an imperfect way.

I have a relationship like a movie…

And I rather have a normal one.

I’m 16 and in love with a guy who just left for the Air Force.

I won’t see him in forever.. Or hear from him every day like a usual couple.

And just like the movies he will come back some day and we will get married and be happy.

And even though I want that, I just wish I didn’t have to miss him so terribly…

Like Dear John, The Notebook, and all those other stupid movies.

Be happy you can call him, say I love you every day, and even  argue for a bit.


January 13, 2012

What do you do…
When your heart is torn in two.
When you want to follow your heart,
but your brain isn’t letting you make a start.

What do you do…
When your heart is torn in two
follow the ways of the wise
or go down a path of what could be my demise

What do you do…
When your heart is torn in two
continue in a life from the past
or have a love that will forever last.

What do you do…
When your heart is torn in two
settle down your growing fears
or fight for what you love for many years.

What do you do…



December 23, 2012

Sleep within me dies-
my mind in mental ties
bonds that not even I can break.
Yet, my sanity is at stake
but my poor heart cannot take,
these images I see when I dream.
Things are not as they seem
For my soul is living when I dream,
and when I wake,
I cannot shake
the fear that slithers into my mind
and it taunts at me to find
the answer to its horrible crime.
So I stay awake
for my soul’s sake
because I cannot endure to wake
to another night of heartache
And to fear I give my mind to take.



A Moment….

A Moment…
You cherish it, and once you cherish it-
it disappears.


A Moment…
Delicate as a butterfly,
time goes by
and nothing is as special as that moment.

A Moment…
When it is gone, you miss it.
Your soul aches at the absence
of that feeling you had when you were in that moment.

A Moment…
Could be a smile-
A flash of white teeth
directed your way,
then it’s gone.


A Moment…
Could be the look in your eyes,
there is something there-
and not one of you denies
that there is something special.

A Moment…
The moment before a kiss.
Staring deep into one another’s soul,
and when your soft lips meet his-
The moment rushes by
you break apart feeling the blood rush to your head.


A Moment…
Then there are missed moments.
When her back was faced to you,
you could have said “I love you.”
Only to never see her face again,
Because you missed the moment.

Missed moments are the worse,
Instead of the dull ache of a loved memory,
You have an empty hole of a lost opportunity.

Never miss a Moment…


Copyright 2012

September 10, 2012

I wish I could fly,
fly high into the skies
No one can see me cry.
If I could soar into the skies,
My tears would fall-
on to the Earth
my tears become rain
my pain, flooding the Earth.

I wish I could fly,
fly high into the skies
No one will see my cry.
I will sit on the clouds
and watch people walking by
they can’t see me up in the sky.

I wish I could fly
fly high into the skies
no one will see me cry.
See that I’m dying inside-
See me take a deep breath and sigh,
I’ll fly until I will touch the stars

I wish I could fly,
fly high into the skies
no one can see me cry.
See that a part of me wants to die
Down there, my tears are a weakness,
no one can see that I am a mess,
Outside I smile and lie
Saying I am fine.

I wish I could fly,
fly high into the skies
no one will see me cry
I feel the wind rushing down my back
While soaring I close my eyes
and something in me dies.

Copyright, Esther Star 2012

August 10, 2012


What has happened to people these days??

No one show respect anymore. What happened to being courteous? Favors used to be done because you WANTED to do them. Now you do favors just to get something out of it. Why don’t people make the time to give someone a compliment?  and if you do receive a compliment. Why don’t you accept it?

My sister loves to walk around the mall or grocery stores and giving random people compliments. A lot of the times, these people give her weird looks and don’t even say thank you.

People also like to put the blame on our generation saying, “It’s those young kids who have no respect for their elders.”

When actually the disrespect is coming both ways.

Elders hate it when kids walk around swearing and cussing in front of young children. They also hate it when kids cuss in general.

But as I was sitting  in a community center, an elderly person came in swearing  just over laundry. His mouth was filthier than a sewer rat’s. Another elderly person told him to shut up because there was a kid in the room, and when she left she told me to have a nice day little lady. Now people like that make my day 🙂

Go out there. Make someone’s day! Put a smile on their face. Knowing that you made them smile is compensation enough, don’t you think? Besides, it wouldn’t hurt you to do it. Life isn’t about what you get FROM life. It’s about what you GIVE to it. That’s what we were born to do! Give… Not to take. If we give enough, that’s when will get blessed, and then we receive.